If you're reading this, then you've found this site. I am so sorry that I had to create this site. Truly. If it were up to me, I'd flip some magic switch that would go back in time and undo all of the lying, all of the fighting, all of the paranoia, and the anger.
There have been other points where I've come close to making a public website explaining all of these events, and those efforts have always been pulled offline to avoid making you feel like you were being 'attacked', because you had begun to view all interactions with me to be adversarial in nature as opposed to collaborative, the latter of which would have been my preference.
Before you started saying these things about me, and before you left, before you were angry, you were the sweetest person I had ever encountered. I would do anything to go back in time and enjoy that person's company. But that can't happen, and it's been long enough to prove that you're not that person anymore, and that you don't want to be.
You've made it very clear that you intend to bury the things that were done to me by you and on your behalf, and you've also made it clear that you want people to think I'm 'crazy' and 'psychotic' and a 'stalker' so that my credibility will not be sufficient to crawl out from under these malicious lies. By continuing to allow these false notions to circulate, you are keeping it going, because people believed you. It's also been made clear recently by events that have occurred on the facebook social network that you are still telling people these things.
My theory is that you need to believe those things about me instead of believing that I am someone who loved you very much, tried his hardest to hold things together during his time with you, and tried to restore some sanity to the situation with you when things got weird.
I tried for two years to straighten this all out, and I'm tired of defending myself against these lies. You've made it clear you don't want people to know that they were lies, or even misunderstandings. At some points, you have even 'acted' and staged interactions to make it appear that these things were true. At other points, you either created fake accounts pretending to be me, or someone created them on your behalf so that evidence could be falsified. To me that is unacceptable and I have had enough.
I'm sorry that this site was even necessary. I'm sorry for any trouble it causes you, because I do care about you very much. You were everything to me-- that's why we were getting married, it was a mutual feeling.
But what you've done to me through others, and the way I've been abused emotionally is something that continues to cause great harm to me even still, because people believed you and you never told them that you were lying about me. On top of that, the way in which you ended our engagement was traumatic, abusive and vile. I regret that we never could resolve our new differences and find mutual closure.
I'm going to try to be more than fair to you while I lay everything out for people to read, and I'm going to try to do it in a way that doesn't interfere with your life or your reputation much. But there's probably going to be a little crossover. And that's fair, and that's appropriate. Without your help in clearing up the lies, there's no way to avoid that. My best suggestion is to be as honest with everyone as you know how to be and hope that people understand why you lied to them.
You personally are going to believe whatever it is that you really believe. There's no way to know what that is, because you're busy pretending to be someone else while you try to reinvent yourself. Like none of this ever happened.
I'm sorry. Really. I just don't know of any other way to clear this up without your help.
Jerry Thibodeau
